A few mornings ago, I felt God speak to my heart about marriage. Especially my marriage with my own husband. This stirred my soul up so deep. I could not get it out of my mind. I just knew this was something I could not forget. The Lord was really tugging at my heart about this. It was such a strong influence on my heart I feel I need to share it.
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Photo by Heather
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Let us think of marriage as a rope with a single knot in the middle. The husband on the left side of the knot with both hands on the rope. The wife on the right side of the knot and she is holding the rope with both hands as well.
The knot in the middle of the rope represents God. The closer the married couple is to the knot in the middle, the stronger their faith in God will be and the stronger their marriage will be. The closer the couple is to the knot (God) the bigger the chance of their marriage being built on God. Also, the closer they are to the knot (God), the closer they are to one another.
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| Photo by Heather |
As time moves on, the honeymoon feeling of newlyweds begins to wear off.
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| Photo by Heather |
If the husband and wife are not careful things, people, children, ministry, hobbies, jobs, just plain 'ole busyness and everyday life will start to cause distance between the two of them. These distractions (even though they maybe good distractions) will begin to play tug-of-war with the rope they are holding onto.
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| Photo by Heather |
Before they know it, they have lost their grip and each of them are now at the opposite ends of the rope.
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| Photo by Heather |
This has created a great distance between them.
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| Photo by Heather |
They may even be barely hanging on to the frayed ends of the rope by one hand. It is possible that they are close to losing their connection to one another all together.
Not only are they a long way from each other, but they are also a good distance away from the power source that fueled their marriage and even their lives. The more distance that is created between the married couple and the knot (God), the more space there is to fill with other things that push them further and further apart. These things stand in the way of them reconnecting to one another and the knot (God) in the rope.
These things that begin to fill the space between the husband, wife, and their power source, sneak in. This does not happen overnight. It does not happen in just a day or two. These things slip into their relationship so slowly they do not even notice they have become disconnected from each other and the knot (God) until something happens to open the couple's eyes to see the giant space that has grown between them. When the distance becomes this great, neither of them are meeting the needs of their spouse as they are called by God to do. They are more than likely wore out and have nothing else to give. They have pulled too far away from the knot (God) and their spouse to be refreshed.
Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 1 Corinthians 7:5 NIV
Unfortunately, this distance makes room for temptation. This is where Satan will have a field day. Do not let him have a stronghold over your relationship. He only wants to kill, steal, and destroy what God has for you.
No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. 1 Corinthians 10:13 NIV
Married couples need to pay very close attention to the relationship they have together, but most of all they need to make sure they are as close to the knot (God) in the rope as possible. Only then can they make sure they do not allow distance to grow between them.
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| Photo by Heather |
As husbands and wives, we need to make our marriage relationship a priority. We may even need to use a calendar to schedule date nights, or how about a morning date where you grab breakfast and watch the sunrise?
Marriage was instituted by God.(You can read about it in Genesis chapter 2) So, we need to make sure we do not allow too much time to pass between moments we spend together with our spouse.
If you do not have space between you, Great! Just keep working so you never have a moment where you grow apart.
If you are both hanging on by the threads in the rope, do not give up. Just start working back towards the knot. (Your relationship with God) As you work toward the knot, you will work toward each other. While you are working towards the knot, move some things that have taken up time in your schedule off the calendar. Now, fill those empty slots with time spent with your spouse.
I would like to thank my daughter and her husband for standing in as models for this post.
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